Tuesday, December 18, 2018

WEEKLY COMMENTARY: Does Christianity Have A Place For Hardened Hearts?


In today's American society many of us have been bombarded this Fall with requests to make contributions to worthy causes.  If we honored each request ---- political candidate contributions, money for cancer research, our church, worthy not-for-profit organizations, and so forth, perhaps the total would be well beyond our means.  But, where do we draw the line?

Most of us have a concern for others ---- this is called EMPATHY.  But empathy doesn't mean saying "yes" to every request.  You and I cannot literally save the world, so we must select for support  the organizations that are important to us.  Perhaps we should let something from our own life experience determine which issues are closest to our hearts and most deserve our money.

We need to define "empathy" a bit more precisely.  Webster's says it is the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts and experience of another person, without that person's past or present feelings, thoughts and experience being fully communicated to us.

But, what about people who seem deficient, even devoid of empathy?  They are self-focused, narcissistic, always thinking about what's in it for them, and never respond to the needs of others.  People with an "empathy deficiency disorder", as some experts call it, seem to lack a moral compass.  They often seem unable to distinguish between right and wrong.

Jesus gave us a brilliant example of empathy   In Luke 10: 25 - 37, Jesus gives us the following parable:
               "A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he fell into
                the hands of robbers.  They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and
                went away, leaving him half dead."

                "A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw
                 the man, he passed by on the other side.  So too, a Levite, when he came
                 to the place and saw him, he passed by on the other side."

                "But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was, and when he 
                 saw him, took pity on him.  He went to him and bandaged his wounds,
                 pouring on oil and wine.  Then he put the man on his own donkey, took
                 him to an inn and took care of him.  The next day he took out two silver
                 coins and gave them to the innkeeper.  'Look after him,' he said 'and when
                 I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have."

                 Then Jesus asks: "Which of these three men do you think was a neighbor
                  to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?"  Jesus' reply to his own
                  question:  "The one who showed mercy."

Do you see that Jesus seems to be talking about empathy, when he asks the question "who was a neighbor"? 

Are you and I regularly capable of empathy?  Research seems to show that whether the potential to experience empathy and care appropriately for others is realized, or undermined, is largely molded by early life experiences, starting at birth and continuing throughout childhood.

In a recent New York Times article by Personal Health reporter Jane E. Brody, it is stated, "We're all born with a certain endowment, but it can be dramatically up-regulated or down-regulated depending on environmental factors, especially by examples set by a child's caregivers."  The article urges parents to be role models who show respect and caring for others:  "Billy scraped his knee.  Let's go get a Band-Aid for him,"  or  "Mrs. Jones just came home from the hospital.  Let's take her some soup."

Teachers and caregivers in child care and pre-K settings can foster empathy by acknowledging rather than dismissing a child's distress, or by bringing a toy or doll to comfort a child who is upset or injured.  Libraries and bookstores often have an assortment of stories in print and video that demonstrate the giving and receiving of empathy for children at different age levels.

Some of us may have vivid memories of our parents taking turkeys before Thanksgiving to the homes of people who had almost nothing.  Many of our kids tend to focus on what they don't have ---- delivering the turkeys exposes kids to people who have so much less, and helps give the child the gift of acting as a giver.  

With older children, parents might take them to help out in a soup kitchen or visit a nursing home.  It's never too late to guide a child toward greater appreciation of the feelings of others.

Equally important is for parents to demonstrate empathy with their children by acknowledging the child's concerns and feelings, and recognizing their need for security.  For example, when a child is fearful of a dog, instead of saying, "Don't be afraid, he won't bite you, say:---- 'Are you scared of the dog?  What scares you?' "  This validates the child's fears rather than negating them. 

At the same time, parents should not over react by being intolerant of a single second of unhappiness in their child's life, lest such misguided excessive parent empathy deprive the child of developing the grit, perseverance and resilience that is essential to a successful life.

Parents can talk to their children about other people's feelings.  If your child breaks another child's toy, instead of saying ---- "Why did you do that?  That was bad" ---- say: "Your friend is sad because you broke her toy.  What can we do to make up for that?"  Which opens the door for an apology.

Also helpful is to validate your child's difficult emotions instead of just being judgmental.  Suppose the child says "I hate Tommy."  Rather than simply saying it is wrong to hate, ask what makes your child feel that way.  Explore what's behind the feelings, the back story.

My Bible does not say that Jesus used the word "empathy."  But, in his parable, Jesus did not offer any praise for the hard-hearted performance of the priest or the Levite.  As I read it, it was the Samaritan who responded with empathy, that Jesus gave to us as a model for Christians to follow.
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These thoughts are brought to you by the CPC Adult Spiritual Development Team, hoping  tencourage you to pursue some personal spiritual growth this winter at CPC. 
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Tuesday, December 4, 2018

WEEKLY COMMENTARY: CPC's Members In Mission Team Has Been Busy This Year


As you know, Central Church operations are conducted by our pastors, the office and music staffs, and eleven "Teams" (committees), ultimately under the direction of our Board of Deacons and the Elders on the Session.

One of our Session Teams is dedicated to defining our purpose outside Central Presbyterian Church.  That is the Members in Mission Team.  It's members are continually asking "How can Central best project to the world the caring concern of Christ by providing encouragement to the poor, the needy, and those suffering physically and spiritually?"  Under this Team is a separate activity called the "Hands-On Mission Team" focused primarily on encouraging Central members' charitable engagement, as opposed to solely making financial grants. 

It might be interesting to take a look at how the Central Members in Mission Team has attempted to answer this challenge so far in 2018. 

Let's start by determining the Team's resources.  The Session gave the Team a 2018 budget of $68,604.  Importantly, the Team is also blessed with a long-standing endowment of more than $4 million.  However, the Team has disciplined itself to spend no more than a portion of the annual income from the Mission Endowment Fund.  For 2018, they have declared that limit to be $400,000.  This endowment arose from the bequest of Lena Willis, a CPC  member who passed away in 1994.  She gave Central a gift of $3 million to be used to support the Church's mission activities.  We were directed to pay particular attention to care for New Jersey's homeless. .

Therefore, the total financial resources of the Members in Mission Team are $68,604 plus $400,000, amounting to a grand total of $468,604 for 2018.

As of November 26, 2018, the Members in Mission Team had committed itself to spend 93.6% ($443,538) of it's $468,604 resources for 2018.  The final portion is being held back until December 31, for emergency situations which may arise.  If no emergencies arise by year-end, the final portion  will be granted to one or more worthy projects.

Let's look more closely at where the committed grant money will go in 2018:

     ---  19.7% ($93,303)  Youth development projects
     ---  18.0% ($85,000)  Providing temporary or permanent shelter for the homeless
     ---  16.0% ($75,000)  Pre-K education for disadvantaged children
     ---    9.6% ($45,631)  Food and simple clothing for the homeless
     ---    7.4% ($35,000)  PCUSA programs for national disaster relief
     ---    7.2% ($34,000)  Non-U.S. economic/social 3rd World Development
     ---    5.8% ($27,604)  Presbytery's annual Per Capita Assessment
     ---    5.2% ($25,000)  CPC Capital Campaign (also pledged $25,000 for each of the                                                     next 4 years.)
     ---    3.2% ($15,000)  Nadia (missionary in Greece)
     ---    1.5% ($  8,000)  Short-term personal financing to prevent homelessness
           =====   ======
          93.6%  ($443,538)

The Team has committed $130,631 to local homeless programs.  "Local" means programs based in Newark, Elizabeth, Irvington, Morristown, and even Summit.  However, a larger commitment has been made to programs for the development and education of needy youth.  So far, the Team is committing $168,303 to finance Pre-K education classes for disadvantaged kids, and youth programs such as the E'port Tutorial Program.

Hopefully, you may now be a bit curious for more details about the specific activities supported by our Members in Mission Team's grants.  We are out of space here, but in the next few weeks WEEKLY  COMMENTARY will identify specifically the beneficiaries of our Members in Mission Team's grants, and describe briefly how the grant funds will be used.
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These thoughts are brought to you by CPC's Adult Spiritual Development Team, hoping to encourage you to pursue some personal spiritual growth this Fall at CPC.
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